When we
think of disabilities, we think of people in wheelchairs, or people needing a
crutch or cane to get around, but I have learned over the past few years that
many people out there are suffering from silent disabilities. This includes
those suffering from back pain, nerve disorders, and in my case, tarsal
coalition. Anyone inflicted with these conditions looks perfectly normal to
others. This creates its own challenge, as it makes explaining the situation
more difficult.
After each
of my surgeries, I had a slight limp for the first few weeks of weight bearing.
Inevitably, the limp would gradually go away, and people would make comments
such as "you are walking so great" or "glad to see you
recovering." These statements were always well intentioned, but acted like
another stab to my already unstable emotional state as in each case, my pain
level remained the same. People expect that with a foot injury, you have
surgery, use crutches for a few weeks, and are back to normal before you know
it. I have realized that it is virtually impossible for people to comprehend
that there is not a cure for every foot/bone disorder.
Sometimes,
I think it's easier to make it through social situations when I use crutches or
am in a walking boot. It acts as a signal to others that I am not able to stand
on my feet for very long and people actively work to make you more
comfortable. In many ways, being on
crutches comes with perks similar to pregnancy J. When I am not using
crutches, on the other hand, people give me strange looks when I wear tennis
shoes with dress clothes, or sit down when everyone else is standing. Sometimes
it is exhausting to explain over and over again that I simply can't stand for
more than a few minutes.
At the same
time, if there is one thing I have learned over the past two years, it is that
people are good and kind. They want to know if you are suffering and want to do
whatever little bit they can do to ease the pain. This has taught me to know
how to ask for help and when to speak up when I need to sit down. It may be
awkward for me, and it may feel like everyone is staring, but in the end,
friends and family want us to be as comfortable as possible.
