Tarsal Coalition – The Silent Disability

When we think of disabilities, we think of people in wheelchairs, or people needing a crutch or cane to get around, but I have learned over the past few years that many people out there are suffering from silent disabilities. This includes those suffering from back pain, nerve disorders, and in my case, tarsal coalition. Anyone inflicted with these conditions looks perfectly normal to others. This creates its own challenge, as it makes explaining the situation more difficult.

After each of my surgeries, I had a slight limp for the first few weeks of weight bearing. Inevitably, the limp would gradually go away, and people would make comments such as "you are walking so great" or "glad to see you recovering." These statements were always well intentioned, but acted like another stab to my already unstable emotional state as in each case, my pain level remained the same. People expect that with a foot injury, you have surgery, use crutches for a few weeks, and are back to normal before you know it. I have realized that it is virtually impossible for people to comprehend that there is not a cure for every foot/bone disorder.

Sometimes, I think it's easier to make it through social situations when I use crutches or am in a walking boot. It acts as a signal to others that I am not able to stand on my feet for very long and people actively work to make you more comfortable.  In many ways, being on crutches comes with perks similar to pregnancy J. When I am not using crutches, on the other hand, people give me strange looks when I wear tennis shoes with dress clothes, or sit down when everyone else is standing. Sometimes it is exhausting to explain over and over again that I simply can't stand for more than a few minutes.

At the same time, if there is one thing I have learned over the past two years, it is that people are good and kind. They want to know if you are suffering and want to do whatever little bit they can do to ease the pain. This has taught me to know how to ask for help and when to speak up when I need to sit down. It may be awkward for me, and it may feel like everyone is staring, but in the end, friends and family want us to be as comfortable as possible.